Captured
by Lotus Aia
Summary: Kakashi and Iruka are captured on a mission, stripped naked, and left in a cold room. Random bit of humorish fluff. Shonen ai, yaoi esque


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Hello everyone! This is kind of a nothing fic to keep me sane in my writer's block from Internet Perdition and Thoughts Pending. (to all of you who opened this getting ready to rant for Internet Perdition... sorry! Total writer's block!) 

Far from the quality Internet Perditions is in, but amusing none the less. Enjoy!

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Captured

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"Woke up, Lightwieht?" Kakashi muttered. 

Iruka ignored the comment and looked down at himself, more interested in the undying fact that he was in the nude on a cold cement floor. The room was spacious enough, but boring to a point of dreary. "Where are we?"

"Prison room. Pretty nice if you ask me. We've got four walls with a door instead of our crappy bars and chains system." He mused, never having moved from his position. The young man's thighs were open brazenly with his legs up and elbows each resting on a knee while he stared around the room. No shame.

"They took your mask off." Iruka noted, eyeing the Shinobi with a chill in realizing how angry the man must have been.

"They'll get their dues for it." Kakashi promised without so much as a drop of emotion to his chilling voice.

Iruka looked down at himself, then around at his body. "We seem to be in good condition. Did the knock out poison work on you?" he asked curiously, checking his body for imminent wounds.

Kakashi shrugged one shoulder an inch or two. "I got dizzy, but they couldn't knock me out. I faked it and listened." He explained in a lower voice.

"They're probably listening to us." Iruka turned around and leaned against Kakashi's back, giving himself a warm backrest.

"I know. I don't really care." He shifted a bit, getting comfortable with Iruka against him. "My ass hurts."

Iruka smiled slightly. "What's wrong? Don't like being on the receiving end of someone shoving a probe up your ass?" he tilted his head back to look at the side of Kakashi's face languidly. He dropped his head onto the shoulder and closed his eyes. "In any case, mine doesn't hurt. Pays to be uke."

Kakashi snorted, shaking his head a bit and looking down to his shoulder where Iruka smiled pertly.

"Best not to be talking about those things when we're naked in an empty room. I'm lively to molest you." Kakashi warned, eyes lazily staring down to the man.

Iruka snorted, stretching his legs out and crossing his ankles in a relaxed position. "Hm. Would be funny to see our captor's faces if we were having sex when they walked in, though, don't you think?" He grinned lecherously, Kakashi giving him a semi-surprised look.

"You're more perverted than I am, I think. You just make me out to be the bad guy."

Iruka bit at the neck presented to him when Kakashi tilted his head back thoughtfully. "You read porn in public. What do you expect?"

"To be left alone. Works, doesn't it?"

Iruka laughed, rocking his head forward to allow air to his lungs. "Kakashi… I'd like to say I don't understand you, but I really do."

Kakashi was pleased internally, but only showed his delight by giving Iruka a soft kiss to the cheek. "Hmm."

After a few long moments, Iruka finally sighed and looked around them. "Why haven't you blown this place to hell yet?"

Kakashi shrugged nonchalantly, uninterested. "I'm interested to see what they plan to do with us."

"Why didn't you fight back when they were taking us?" Iruka asked curiously, hand reaching back to run a seductive finger just above Kakashi's butt crack.

Kakashi ignored the arousing finger and smiled wickedly. "Anyone mean enough to yank me out of hot passionate sex is going to get more than a fast and painless death. They're going to pay completely. Why didn't _you _fight back then?"

Iruka scowled at his lover, "Because you weren't fighting. I figured you didn't want me to by the look on your face." He grunted crossly.

Kakashi smiled, pleased with irking the young sensei. "Ah. I see. You're good at reading me. But I guess that's why I love you, isn't it?"

"Hm. I can't answer that." Iruka murmured fondly.

A silence fell over them for a while, the room seeming to grow colder over time. Iruka finally shivered a bit, Kakashi glancing over his shoulder at the frail-looking figure. "Cold?" he murmured, reaching back to feel Iruka's icy skin.

"A bit." The tan skin shivered again.

"Hn." A disgruntled Kakashi was never a friendly Kakashi. "Bastards. Leaving us in here naked when night fall is coming." He pushed himself up languidly and sauntered to the metal door that appeared to be the only exit in the entire building. Raising a fist, he banged hard on the door, breaking the silence of the room with the rude racket. "Hey! We're cold!"

He was answered with a metallic clunk, then a muffled answer. "Shuddup in there, or we'll kill you!"

"Then get on with it!" Kakashi banged on the door harder, denting it in finally with one final blow.

"Hey!" The guards' muffled yells grew louder as they apparently got up from their posts to yell into the door itself. "Stop that or we'll be forced to kill you!"

Kakashi clasped his hands together with a playful smirk, the metal door suddenly glowing red hot after a series of hand signs. He heard the guards outside yelling and running, the scraping of chairs giving Kakashi a general count of people in the room over. "Wow. Fourteen people. I guess we're not very special." He took his hands off the door and went back to Iruka, sitting behind the other man and wrapping around him tightly. He sucked up the offered body heat and burrowed deeper his boyfriend and currently missions partner.

"That should get them all excited." Iruka murmured, smirking. "My little instigator."

Kakashi pulled his head back to look down at Iruka. "I'm bored. What else do you expect?"

"You're bored? Why don't you get us clothes and get us out of here then, jounin?" he pulled his legs to his chest and hugged them tightly. "I don't know why you're not cold." He breathed, a shiver snaking down his back with a small breath of wind.

The white haired Shinobi merely shrugged and looked around the empty room. Now that his fun of watching Iruka wake up groggily and fend of the aftereffects of sleeping poison was over… he had grown increasing apathetic towards their situation.

"That's it. I'm bored. I'm not having fun anymore." Kakashi declared mostly to himself. He, regrettably, pulled away from Iruka and walked to the far wall, his Sharingan spinning wildly suddenly. A wicked smile crossed his lips. "Iruka-sensei… it would be wise to stand behind me."

o0O0o

Genma gaped, and then he stuttered, then he fell from his post ungracefully. Raidoh watched surprised as he fell the entire way down from the guard tower to land flat on his ass. "What the hell is your pro-!" he paled though, staring out at the oncoming figures from the forest.

"Ka-ka-ka…"

Iruka had the decency to blush furiously… all over his entire body. Kakashi on the other hand thrust his hips forward brazenly and put both hands up over his eyes as if to shield his vision from the sun. "Genma-san! You seem to have left your post. You know you shouldn't do that?"

"Yo-your naked!"

"Well aren't we observant today, Genma-san?" Kakashi beamed from beneath the makeshift mask that looked suspiciously like a flag.

"Ah-what-how?"

Iruka was blushing horribly pink and covering his gentilia heatedly. "Ah, Raidoh-san? I don't suppose we could borrow the blankets from the reserve box up in the guard tower, please?" he asked politely, looking up mournfully.

A sly smile laced Raidoh's features. "I don't know… now would be a good time to get whatever I wanted from the two of you, wouldn't it?"

Kakashi's smiling features never wavered. "Now."

Raidoh stiffened. "Right."

Kakashi and Iruka entered Konoha in blankets, and the event was not forgotten for the rest of their lives. To their dismay. But it was good for laughs.

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Told you it's not the best I've written. Internet Perditions has not been forgotten! Don't worry! 

-Aia


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